The Contestants |
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The Breakdown |
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Advantages
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Disadvantages
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Kills
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Kills
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How we think the fight will go
“You just don’t get it,” the magician said over a pint of ale. “I could have dropped a planet on him.”
“And yet you didn’t, Pug—and here you sit,” the pale man sitting next to him said. They were at a small bar in Hell’s Kitchen, not far from where the Suvudu gods worked. Pug still had a bitter taste in his mouth as he walked to the pub and could see their tower looming above.
Mocking him.
And now he sat with a person of evil—a man he normally would have tried to destroy—sharing a drink. He glanced up at the television.
“He always goes for the Sectumsempra,” Pug said. “It never works.”
“It wasn’t fun, though,” Lestat muttered. “And I didn’t even have any blood to lose.”
“It’s just so unoriginal.”
“How’re your bitter grapes, champ?”
“Go to Hell,” Pug said.
“On my way,” Lestat smiled. He stared intently across the bar, and a bottle of cheap red flew into his hand.
Pug shook his head and turned his attention back to the TV. He sighed, watching Quick Ben draw on Serc and fly through the air.
“What?” Lestat asked, not really in the mood to hear Pug moan, but pretty sure he should just get it over with–a few lifetimes had taught him a little something about human nature.
“It’s just that…,” Pug began before taking another mouthful of ale. “It’s just that I could have had a magnificent duel with Quick, but instead I lost to him because I threw paper instead of rock!”
“Yeah, that was pretty stupid of you.”
Pug glared at the vampire, who simply shrugged and turned his attention to the fight on the television.
“Finite Incantatem!” Pug looked at the screen to see that whatever Quick Ben had been planning was thwarted by Snape—including his ability to fly. Even as Quick Ben fell, Snape was running towards him with his wand in his left hand, the right one destroyed by something the High Mage must have done to him earlier in the match.
“Avada—”
Quick Ben disappeared.
Or, rather, the screen didn’t show him anymore. Didn’t show much of anything, as first the landscape went dark, then suddenly alternated between flashing colors of red and green. Snape was still visible, and looked particularly distressed by the dazzling display.
And the fact that Quick was nowhere to be seen.
“Huh,” Lestat grunted.
“Meanas,” Pug muttered. “And maybe Rashan.”
“What?”
“Doesn’t matter. Watch.” The two once again looked up at the television.
Snape was now stumbling about as the ground shook beneath him, jagged rocks shooting up and catapulting the wizard through the air. Even as he tumbled to the ground, though, Snape was reaching out with his wand. The sound from the TV was that of screeching, as if something was distorting his speech, but it was clear even as he shifted from red and green and back that Severus was mouthing words.
“Ossio Ben?” Lestat asked, squinting, trying to read the wizard’s lips.
“Smart,” Pug said. He was starting to really appreciate this Snape’s ability to duel.
The ground stopped shaking on the television, and the air before Snape seemed to shift. Standing—bracing himself—he said rather clearly “Homenum Revelio!, and much to Lestat’s surprise, Quick Ben was on the screen.
“Nice!” Lestat said, draining the bottle in his hand. Looking down the bar, he held out his hand. “Accio wine!”
Pug shook his head in disgust. On the TV, Snape was pointing his wand at Quick Ben. “Crucio!”
Quick Ben fell to the ground, his lean body contorted in pain. But he didn’t stay down, and Snape’s surprise was evident on the wizard’s face. He pointed the wand at the High Mage again, clearly trying to intensify the spell…but Quick pressed on, looking stronger and stronger as he did.
“He’s healing himself,” Pug said.
“Neat trick,” Lestat said, taking a deep pull on the new bottle of wine. “It’s almost over.”
“Yeah.”
And it was. Snape, desperate, cried out “Incendio! Stupefy! Avada Kedavra!” and yet nothing was happening. The fire hit Quick Ben, but although he winced, he kept on coming, a hand raised in Snape’s direction. And then it was if whatever juice Snape had was gone, the stunning and killing spell having no effect at all. The wizard looked down at his wand, unbelieving, as if it was no longer the object it once was.
The world stopped flashing green and red…and Quick Ben plunged a knife into Snape’s ribs.
“Two magicians, and it comes down to—”
Lestat was interrupted by a sudden movement on the screen, as Snape’s left hand shoved his apparently useless wand into Quick Ben’s stomach.
“Didn’t think the boy had it in him,” Lestat said.
The two magicians staggered, falling to their knees. For a moment, it looked as if that would be the end of both of them.
Yet Snape’s collapse continued, and soon he was on the ground, unmoving. Quick Ben, however…
“Healing himself again?” Lestat said.
“It would appear so.”
“Maybe you were better off not fighting him to the death.”
“Maybe…”
Pug watched the television as Quick Ben gathered himself—and his knife from Snape’s body—and made his way off-screen.
He wondered if Lestat was right. He wondered if Suvudu would give him another shot in the future.
Predicted Winner: Quick Ben
NOTE: THIS MATCH ENDS ON SUNDAY, MARCH 27TH, 2011, AT 5 PM, ET
Quick Ben is a character from the The Malazan Book of the Fallen series by Steven Erikson; Severus Snape is a character from the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
Quick Ben image courtesy of Michael Komarck. Severus Snape image courtesy of Grant Gould.
This write-up is kind of cool how it takes two previous participants and has them watching the duel. Good job.
Meh. Kinda boring. Snape has no chance.
It’s most likely my favourite write-up in this edition – not because it’s representative, for how the fight would really go (I don’t think any Harry Potter character has any chance with most of Malazan heroes), but ’cause it’s amuzing: especially Pug regretting that he didn’t choose the rock (which, I guess, nicely refers to the first line).
I am also happy to notice, that the way QB uses magic is much nearer to what we can read in the Malazan series, that what was presented in the Salomon Kane write-up; I think that the fact, that dpomerico is not very familiar with Erikson books, actually gives us quite original write-ups, which I do enjoy
Still, Quick would destroy Snape in no time – probably before Snape would even notice, that the fight started; the write-up nicely shows why nothing Snape can come up with provides any threat for QB – but it somehow underestimates the High Mage’s offensive abilites; opening seven wardens at once could be too little for Pug, but would be more than sufficient in case of Snape.
I don’t know if Snape could win, but I think this poorly represents how a full grown and experienced wizard would fight. First of all, he wouldn’t need to mouth words during a fight. Also it mentions his Occlumency but I didn’t see it mentioned in the fight. He could always be a step ahead, quick moving, and could at least stay in it a bit longer than how he was pitifully portrayed.
This fight does not show Snape’s full potential. It shows him constantly attacking, but Snape would not necessarily do so. It also forgets about disillusionment charms (useful in battle, especially for a intelligent person like Snape) and any potions he may have prepared earlier (he isn’t the potion master at Hogwarts for nothing). However, the most important weapon in Snape’s arsenal would be his intelligence and resourcefulness.
@ deathpigeon
You’re most likely right, but actually in terms of intelligence and resourcefulness Quick Ben has no match in the brackets – I think the write-up does Snape a favor, that it doesn’t really take this factor into account, ’cause he would be outwitted for sure.
@deathpigeon
It’s also not the whole fight. This is the end of a long, long fight — one in which Snape would likely have tried every subtle and sneaky thing available to him only to learn that he couldn’t possibly match Quick’s sneakiness.
@Courtney
Occlumency can be defeated by a strong, disciplined mind. Quick has TWELVE strong, disciplined souls forged into one mind.
—
Definitely the best mage-fight writeup yet. It seems like it was written by someone who had actually read the Malazan Book of the Fallen (and Harry Potter, of course, but I assume that’s a given on a webpage like this) and understood the magic. The fact that the fight was being watched on a TV by Pug and Lestat allowed commentary that was also well written. More amusingly, though, is that I’d forgotten that Pug and Quick did Rock-Paper-Scissors…in my mind, this write-up is what had really happened:
http://sf-fantasy.suvudu.com/2011/03/cage-match-2011-pug-versus-quick-ben.html/comment-page-1#comment-25865
Well, in my opinion Quick Ben is just another God-like entity in this cage match and has no place in it. I make a habit of voting against such characters like that never show up again.
Quick Ben, God-Like? Nay, he is but a mortal, who happens to exist in a universe where Gods are not all-powerful.
Well, as far as the setting goes, QB’s not the top dog by any stretch of the imagination, but he’s gorram smart (and he’ll be the first to tell you about it, sort of like airliner pilots), and mostly manages to stay alive by laying low and keeping quiet around more badass characters. But relative to HP’s setting, as someone has already said, most matchups would be a curbstomp battle. The scale is incomparable (and please note I’m not saying either one’s superior, they’re just very different).
Oh, I am not saying that the characters of the two settings can be compared, but compared to some other characters in this and last years cage match, QB is not “God-Like”. I mean, this year we have the Kwisatz Haderach, who was sadly and nonsensically defeated by Perrin, as well as Pug (who was beaten by QB here), and Thomas Covenant.
Quick Ben is not god-like in the sense that those 3 are. He just regularly manages to foil them. Because that is just the way Malazan Book of the Fallen is.
“Five thousand soldiers . . . spitting in the face of every god”
quick is defenetly god like, still mortal yes, but he is ascendant now since he faced iccy, he is as powerful if not more then most gods, and he says he knows he is the only one who can stand in draconus way, who is prolly the most powerful elder god. he is the mage of high house dark…. and not even an andii. and spitting in the face of the gods is different then being godlike. quick dose both. and if quick decided he was gettin his ass kicked by some mirical and though he was going to lose to a mage, he would just notion to the shadows ans kalam would step out and knife him with the orratal dagger. quick always has a shaved knuckle in the hole.
I thought he will only ascend after he dies, due to being a Bridgeburner?
Admittedly, I have not read the Crippled God yet, so don’t spoil it for me! If the answer comes from that book!
NOOOOOOO!!!!
why does snape get so low voting !!!
i love him…
anyone plz give snape a tiny vote …
@LoveSnape: Snape gets fewer votes because people don’t think he’ll win against Quick Ben.
Which is my opinion, too. Quick has lots of warrens, Denul (healing) among them, and he’s a clever person. Cleverer than Snape.
Quick Ben is winning because he is pure, unfiltered badass. Common knowledge to those who have actually read the books.
Are the people who have voted for Snape even remotely familiar with Malazan books? If not please save yourself the embarrassment. There is just no comparing the Harry Potter world to the magic of the Malazan Empire. A street urchin from the Empire could kill Snape.
Snape, versus Ben Adaephon Delat… what a mismatch. As far as mages go, QB is probably one of the most powerful ones around. Snape is more a backroom schemer rather than a frontline battler IMO. That being said, QB would still run rings around Severus in terms of sheer deviousness (the illusion when facing down the Edur warlocks springs to mind here, albeit with a bit of help from a certain hairy female…) and would definitely be capable of stuffing Voldemort’s noseless head into a toilet bowl.
All that, and he hasn’t even Ascended yet. Wonder what he’ll be like when that happens.
By the way, Quick Ben’s initials = B.A.D. Wonder if Mr. Erikson meant that.
@Tam
Yeah… A Malazan female Heavy would probably own most of the people in this tourney… and all of us fans afterwards lol…
when are the next fights up?
@Matt — The semifinals go up next week, so Jon Snow versus Vin begins Monday, March 28th at 11 am ET, and the winner of this versus the winner of Perrin/Martin begins Wednesday, March 30th at 11 am ET.
If I was Snape, I’d prepare some sneaky poisons spread by air in advance. When approaching the arena, the sleepy/numbing/dumbing poison would affect Ben without him even noticing. This would break his concentration, intelligence and the ability to act in any way. And as we know Snape, I’d guess he would have check mate Ben in advance. Gather the information, study your enemy, make preparations and come to the arena with a faint smile knowing the battle has been already won. However…. despite all of that, we know the ABILITY of Bridge Burners to survive unsurvivable conditions. So no matter what Snape would do, there is no doubt who’d survive in the end B-) Bridge burners are masters of improvisation and the art of kicking Hood’s balls B-)
Snape is a pretty tough wizard. I mean, being able to kill someone just by pointing and saying “Avada Kedavra” is pretty powerful. But… Quick Ben is just amazing. The magic in Malazan is just so powerful that I can’t see Snape being able to match.
People are not giving snape enough credit He’s A POTIONS MASTER!!! he would have whipped up one of those fideleus or whatever it was called luck potions and ben wouldve tripped lost his drawers and blown himself up! LOL
100% Quick Ben would win this duel. He’s almost a friggin’ Ascendant, for K’rul’s sake.
I can’t believe how fast these guys are going up in votes, just saying. I mean, yesterday evening, they still hadn’t cracked a thousand, either of them. It was pretty close, within a hundred votes. Then suddenly Quick Ben got about 1200 votes out of the blue within literally a couple of hours, and since then Snape’s picked up about 400 of his own. I mean, where did that come from? Neither of these guys has gotten particularly high numbers before. Did both fanbases realize simultaneously that the the cage match was actually going on?
Pretty much spot-on Dunno. A rallying of troops, so to speak.
Toggs Teats and Hoods Hairy Ones…. Snape is going the way of a cusser in a battle… Bang…. its all over
Alatharenn:
That’s the thing though, if they both had the oppurtunity to study and prepare, I still imagine QB would out maneuver Snape.
And then of course the simple fact that in each other’s worlds what could Snape honestly find out of use about QB. It’s not like his exploits are documented within the Malaz world. Sure you could find out that he was a Bridgeburner, but not much of use.
On the other hand, public record (within the magical comunity) would show that Snape is potion master at a school, and probably that he was a Death Eater, which would straight up give you the tactics people are suggesting and warn you of his favourite spells.
Aero182:
QB is definitely god-like compared to Snape. But heck, even when he was only a squad mage, he was probably close to god-like compared to Snape. The magic systems don’t really compare.
He’s powerful, but in the Malaz world he’s not god level powerful. He brigdes the gap with cunning and unprecedented levels of diversity. He can do a fair bit of damage to powerful beings, but we do see him overwhelmed several times.
*possible spoilers* – I have yet to read Crippled God by the way so perhaps some of this changes
What I mean when I say he’s not god level powerful is that he can’t wield as much magic as the likes of Tayshrenn, Anomander or Envy. He gets floored by a punch from a soldier, physically he’s not on the level of Brood, and again Anomander. He’s quick thinking, but he doesn’t have the speed of Dassem or high level Seguleh. He can magically pack enough punch to hurt certainly, but he doesn’t have the stamina of the truly god-like of that world.
Sure, he plans to oppose a few of the truly powerful, but for him that rarely means walking up to their face and starting a duel like Rake would, because he likes surviving too much.
DjPakit: I was just thinking that Ranelling Snape all over his potions room would be a great tactic, drop a cusser on his head via warren XD
@Luci …. forgot about Ranal …. hehehehe most definitely what would happen to Snape… after all he would assume to be officer material and we all know what happens to officers who assume to much ;o)
quick wipes his ass with boring, childish torn out pages from harry potter books………not to mention hes probably a soultaken snake that could swallow severus whole.
Ugh. If I have to read one more superior, gloating “huh huh, chortle chortle, we’ve all voted at least five times” Quick Ben butt-kisser post, I’m going to puke.
Or at least regret voting for him.
@james
wow. someones a fun-sucker
no ones got a gun to your head james get the fuck off the site………..
@ Kaostoste et al: Sorry guys. That was over the top. In my defense, I was a little sloshed at the time and was mostly replying to Olmstead.
@ Olmstead: I still maintain you’ve got something brown on your nose…just there…
You can brown-nose a fictional character? Well, in that case, where is Kisswhere hiding? Total mismatch in my opinion. A single Boles brother could take down Hogwarts in a few hours. Throwing someone like Quick Ben at just one of em… If I were Quick Ben, id be offended.
Wow. This vote makes Severus seem so vulnerable.
Has anyone here forgotten Severus knows Occulemency? Has anyone here forgotten the killing curse can be cast and as quick as a matter of LIGHT YEARS? Think so. I am not choosing Severus just because I’m a Severus Snape messenger lmao…. I’m just saying…. people here really aren’t taking Severus Snape’s background for granted. It all makes him look like a complete pansy, which he is the exact opposite of. Give him deserved credit and his powers, first. THEN debate.
@Dexter:
Of course Snape is an accomplished Occlumens, but if one takes into consideration that Quick Ben, too, knows Mockra (warren of the mind)… well. I can’t for the life of me remember if Occlumency will be able to manipulate minds the way Mockra can, but if it can then Snape has a chance against QB.
Also, Avada Kedavra? Quick will simply open a warren in front of him, and whoosh the Avada would disappear into it. Unless Snape can manage to outwit QB (which I doubt he can do)…
So by the power of space and time; Quick can conjure up some other sort of a grandeur of a killing curse? Rubbish. Even if he could master the potential speed of the universe I don’t think it would muster the energy of already the killing curse has had. Quick will have to fight him with the weapons hes had, just as Severus. I don;t think opening up some warren will consume the curse as fast the curse will consume him.
Occulemency(I think I’ve been spelling it right lol) can be as manipulative as the mastermind of the inner mind between skill and sovereignty as it could be. It depends on the user-which Severus, as we know, is much skilled by(According to also other observing fans) this power, in ways beyond everyone’s notice. The background of his character is a nice example. Severus can depict perhaps even what Quick would try to do next, just by simply reading through him; possibly while given enough time, which is as advantageous over Quick as any other trick he may have. Being able to initialize the next person’s move is probably the best power you can have when in combat of wits, skill, or well a fight of magic in general lol. Never say Severus has zero chance(in case anyone here has or thought so). It is also a possibility he can delve into Quick’s mind and completely manipulate him through his head. He has just as much of a higher chance as he, and lacking reference of some of his essential abilities is pretty derisive if you ask me. Most people will attack this argument with things like “BUT he can” and “BUT he has”…. All and all, very intimate….
It doesn’t make a difference if your a tank kick you in the knee you go down I think Snape could do that .
Ummm wow, you got Snape’s info almost all wrong.
He died when he was 38. He was very intelligent and I would go so far as saying that he too had genius level intellicet. He did have remorse. He could fucking fly without a broom. He is a potions master and can do wandless and wordless magic.
Oh and he can read minds.
And physically week? we don’t know that, it’s never been stated by JK. I am voting this whole thing as biased as it is ovbously clear that this person did NOT do their research on Severus Snape.